In an Easter editorial, a local newspaper editor-in-chief lamented Christians who criticize gender ideology, implying such objections are inherently unloving. This claim is not just a misunderstanding of Christian theology and ethics; it represents a deeper cultural confusion about what love truly is. Christians who confront the destructive lies of gender ideology are not engaging in cruelty but in courageous, compassionate truth-telling in the spirit of the prophets and apostles.
This essay will examine what true Christian love looks like, how “toxic empathy” distorts that love, and why speaking truth about gender ideology is both necessary and deeply loving—even when it’s countercultural.
A Culture Adrift: What Happens When We Call Evil Good
Gender ideology is no longer a fringe belief. It is a federally supported, culturally enforced, and educationally mandated system of thought. The Biden administration has made gender identity a centerpiece of its domestic policy. Public schools are increasingly pressured to introduce children—even kindergartners—to so-called “gender diversity” education. If progressive activists achieve their goals, teachers and counselors will guide children through gender transitions without parental knowledge, and parents who object may be accused of abuse.
That may sound sensational—but it is already happening in Canada, California, and other progressive states. For instance, in 2021 a Canadian father was jailed for refusing to call his daughter by male pronouns after she began transitioning at school. In Washington State, SB 5599 allows shelters to house runaway minors for gender-affirming treatment without notifying their parents. Christian pastors in Finland and parts of Canada have been prosecuted for simply quoting the Bible on sexuality.
The question must be asked: Is it loving to remain silent while children are sterilized, mutilated, and indoctrinated?
Real Consequences: The High Cost of “Gender-Affirming Care”
Supporters of gender ideology often frame “gender-affirming care” as life-saving and benign. The reality is far more harrowing. The medical procedures associated with transitioning—both so-called “top” and “bottom” surgeries—are disfiguring, expensive, and medically risky.
“Top Surgery” (Double Mastectomy or Breast Augmentation)
- Involves removing healthy breast tissue in girls or implanting synthetic breast tissue in boys.
- Risks include loss of nipple sensation, painful scarring, infection, and lifelong hormone dependency.
- Insurance may cover the procedure, but revisions, infections, and follow-up surgeries are often not covered, leading to substantial out-of-pocket expenses.
“Bottom Surgery” (Phalloplasty, Vaginoplasty)
- Male-to-female surgery often involves a sigmoid colon vaginoplasty, in which a section of colon is used to simulate a vaginal cavity.
- Complications include chronic infections, necrosis, chronic pain, odor due to colon bacteria, urinary incontinence, and the need for lifelong dilation.
- Female-to-male surgery (phalloplasty) uses forearm or thigh tissue to construct a pseudo-penis.
- Common complications include urinary tract infections, implant failure, tissue death, and total loss of the grafted tissue.
These surgeries cost tens of thousands of dollars, but the real price is far higher—psychologically, physically, and spiritually. A 2023 study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that people who underwent surgical transition were 19 times more likely to commit suicide than the general population, even after surgery. This is not love—it is medicalized despair.
The Tragedy of Toxic Empathy
The editor’s argument that Christians must “know someone” personally in order to speak to these issues reflects a broader cultural move toward what Nancy Pearcey calls toxic empathy. This sentimentality exalts affirmation over truth. It teaches that love means never making anyone feel bad or uncomfortable—even if they are walking toward self-destruction.
This counterfeit love is not the love of Christ. Biblical love is rooted in truth (Eph. 4:15), guided by wisdom (Phil. 1:9–10), and willing to risk offense to rescue souls (Jude 22–23). True empathy listens with compassion but never affirms delusion. We do not validate the dysphoria of an anorexic who believes they are fat, nor should we affirm the dysphoria of someone who believes they were born in the wrong body.
Romans 12:9 is clear: “Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good” (ESV). If we abandon moral clarity under the guise of kindness, we betray both the gospel and the confused individuals we claim to support.
Created in God’s Image: The Reality of Male and Female
Scripture speaks clearly and compassionately to the issue of gender. From the beginning, God created mankind male and female in His image (Genesis 1:27). The differences between men and women are not societal constructs or mistakes of biology—they are intentional reflections of divine glory.
Adam and Eve were created as complements, joined in covenant marriage with the command to be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1:28). This was not merely about reproduction—it was about reflecting God’s design for ordered, flourishing life.
Rejecting this design, as modern gender ideology does, is more than confusion—it is rebellion. It echoes the original sin of seeking autonomy from the Creator (Genesis 3). When individuals deny the God-given reality of their bodies, they not only disconnect from biological truth—they cut themselves off from the possibility of true communion with God and others.
This alienation is deeply spiritual. It cannot be healed by hormones, surgery, or legislation. It can only be healed by reconciliation with God through Jesus Christ, who offers a new identity not based on feelings or desires, but on union with Him.
A False Gospel in the Pulpit
Many congregations of liberal denominations—Christian Church (Disciples of Christ or DOC), United Church of Christ (UCC), The Episcopalian Church (TEC), Presbyterian Church – USA (PCUSA), Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA), United Methodist Church (UMC), Church of the Brethren (COB) and Mennonite Church – USA (MCUSA) among them—have capitulated to the culture. They ordain openly gay clergy, perform same-sex marriages, and bless transitions. In doing so, they have abandoned the biblical gospel and replaced it with a therapeutic, affirming religion built in man’s image.
These pastors preach a gospel of unconditional love but strip it of God’s holiness. Yes, God is love (1 John 4:8), but His love is holy, just, and redemptive—not permissive. Romans 1 shows us that when people exchange the truth of God for a lie, God “gives them over” to their passions—not because He approves, but as judgment.
Faith and repentance are necessary to receive God’s redeeming love. That means turning away from false identities and embracing the truth revealed in Scripture. It means being born again (John 3:3), finding a new identity in Christ—not in gender, sexuality, or personal expression.
Hope for the Hurting
The editor suggested that critics of gender ideology don’t understand what it’s like to struggle with gender or sexual confusion. But that claim ignores a growing number of Christians who have walked that road and now testify to God’s transforming grace.
Becket Cook left the gay lifestyle to follow Christ and now speaks openly about his redemption. Rosaria Butterfield, once a lesbian professor and LGBT advocate, now proclaims the truth of the gospel and biblical sexuality. Christopher Yuan, a former gay man and drug dealer, now teaches biblical theology and has written powerfully on holy sexuality.
These individuals, and countless others, were not “loved” into faith through affirmation—they were challenged with truth, confronted with grace, and changed by the power of God. Today, they find identity not in gender or attraction but in Christ.
Biblical churches are filled with such stories. Real love opens the door to repentance and healing, not a lifetime of hormone dependence and surgeries that leave scars on the body and soul.
What Love Looks Like
To love someone is to will their good—even when it’s hard. Jesus loved the rich young ruler enough to confront him with his idolatry (Mark 10:21). He loved the woman at the well enough to address her sinful relationships (John 4). He loved the Pharisees enough to call them to repentance (Matt. 23). His love was never spineless.
Christian love is not blind tolerance. It is tender truth. It is faithful wounds (Prov. 27:6), not flattering lies.
If we refuse to warn people that they are running toward a cliff—whether physical, emotional, or eternal—we are not loving. We are cowards.
Conclusion: The Most Loving Thing We Can Do
The world says Christians must choose between truth and love. But biblical Christianity never divides what God has joined together. Love without truth is sentimentality. Truth without love is brutality. But truth spoken in love is the gospel.
As Christians, we must never be ashamed of standing against lies that enslave and destroy. Gender ideology is not merely false—it is dangerous. It mars the image of God in mankind, ruins bodies, destroys families, and leads souls away from Christ.
Real love dares to speak up. It dares to warn. It dares to say, “This is not who you are.” And it invites the broken to find true identity—not in a surgeon’s scalpel or a social movement—but in the Son of God who loved them and gave Himself for them.
S.D.G.,
Robert Sparkman
rob@basedchristianity.org
RELATED CONTENT
Megyn Kelly covers the 409-page Trump Administration report challenging “Gender-affirming Care”. She discusses this matter with Dr. Eithan Haim.
Dr. Eithan Haim is a Texas-based general surgeon who became nationally recognized in 2023 after exposing that Texas Children’s Hospital (TCH) continued performing transgender medical procedures on minors, despite publicly stating in 2022 that it had ceased such interventions following directives from Texas Governor Greg Abbott and an opinion from the Texas Attorney General deeming these procedures as potential child abuse under state law.
Chloe Cole and Luke Healy are “detransitioners”. Both are thoughtful individuals who outline the factors that led to their gender dysphoria and subsequent events including their detransition.
This animation demonstrates the male-to-female “bottom surgery”. It is horrifying and many who have undergone this procedure experience horrible, life-altering complications afterwards.
Nancy Pearcey has authored a book titled Love Thy Body that addresses the topic of gender dysphoria. It is well worth a read.
This post is related to the letter to the editor that I submitted below.
Concerning the Related Content section, I encourage everyone to evaluate the content carefully.
I will continue to add videos and other items to the Related Content section as opportunities present themselves.If I have listed the content, I think it is worthwhile viewing to educate yourself on the topic, but it may contain some opinions I don’t agree with.
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Obviously, there are some assertions that are matters of opinion that I will not change, but I always strive to be truthful. We are all capable of mistakes and misunderstandings on occasion, though.
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I recommend these Youtube channels for good content on Christian matters: Founders Ministries, Ligonier Ministries, Grace to You, G3 Ministries, and Truth for Life. RC Sproul, Voddie Baucham, Alistair Begg, Kevin DeYoung, Albert Mohler, Tom Ascol and John MacArthur are well-known, trustworthy pastors and teachers with content across multiple forums.
Francis Schaeffer, Tom Ascol, Allie Beth Stuckey and Nancy Pearcey have some valuable materials related to cultural matters, as well.